People in general tend to always think that we know everything; whether it has to do with their educational, personal or financial lives. However the sad reality is that we don't and this isn't any more obvious then when we think we know what's going on in a particular scenario to only later find out that we had misunderstood the situation. Recently I have had a situation like this that was and is still somewhat personal. Without having all of the facts I had come to the wrong conclusion which almost cost me my relationship with my girlfriend.
Now in a previous relationship I was in, I was being cheated on the whole time and ever since then I have always been very cautious in trusting women and this whole situation developed out of that fear of being cheated on again. Now at the time my girlfriend and I were not boyfriend and girlfriend but we had started dating. We had been really good friends for a while and at that particular time it was starting to develop into something more. We had both been hurt in past relationships due to cheating so we agreed that if we were to be dating, it would be monogamous. Well, one weekend she went with a couple of her friends to a quince out in Wickenburg to dance and what have you. So that night I had talked to her for a bit before she left and I did not see her till the next morning. Now though it is hard to admit, I did get a little jealous because I couldn't help to think that there might be some guys wanting to dance with her and hold her and maybe try to get with her. Also it didn't help knowing that a particular "friend" of hers was going to be there because this friend of hers had been trying to get with her for years. Well long story short, the whole time she was there I was left wondering and hoping that nothing would happen.
The next day I had asked how the dance was and she said that it was ok and later that day I went onto Myspace. I noticed that some of her friends had posted some pictures of the dance of the night before so I figured, "what the hell?" and looked through them. Well one of the pictures I saw was of my girlfriend being held by her "friend" and if that wasn't bad enough, when I went into work, her friends came up to me saying that she has this boyfriend already and that they couldn't believe that she would be leading me on how she was. Now when I heard that I was devastated, it seemed that all of my suspicions were true and that everything that could go wrong was. So when my girlfriend would come up to me I would and want to talk I would just blow her off and ignore her. She was confused by how I was acting and when she went to her friends to talk about it they explained what they had told me earlier at work. Now it turned out that her friends had lied to me, saying what they had said to see how I would react to the news of her being with another guy and though I was relieved to hear that it was all a bad joke, it had put a small rift between my girlfriend and I which over time we got over.
Though we were able to work through that whole ordeal, the whole fiasco could have been avoided. Instead of going to her directly with what I had heard I jumped to the wrong conclusion and allowed myself to dwell on the fact that my love history was being repeated. Just as how Chuck Shepherd had found all the murderers whose middle name was Wayne because he was looking for it, so did I think she was cheating on me because of my self-perpetuating thought that it was going to happen again. So the best thing that can be done is to just go to the source and get the whole story instead of having a couple pieces and trying to make them fit.
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